Currently Reading Cicero : The Life and Times of Rome's Greatest Politician By Anthony Everitt see related

School began and (in its entirety) it rocks my socks off!  The classes are a sinch... teachers for some odd reason love me... and the stereotype of how everyone just releases and becomes friends their senior year totally came true... no one cares anymore... everyone is just being themselves... sweet action baby!... my friend tim made my day today... my phone buzzed during study hall... i thought i had a text message (you know, the usual "hey beautiful) wink) but no! it was tim calling me... i raised my hand... said i needed to "relieve myself" and called him back... tim has been in boot camp for the navy for the past 3 months... im so proud of him... that boy grew up good :) and learned good too :) (yes i do know the correct word usageishness to that) but i talked to him for like 5 sec and told him id text him... he'll be back in october but now hes off to arizona for some training... (hes going to be a cook...yum yum)... besides that i got invited by one of my friends from work to a youth church event thingie next sun at new life church... call me cause im going to get a group to go with me... seriously.. having another "un school" person ask me to a christian even is TIZZITE!... however... there is still so much corruption and junk going around peoples minds... i really feel that god is using me in big ways at my workplace right now... so pray any of you... i was on one of my friends xangas and i looked to her friends sites... she wrote a letter to god that was quite disturbing to me... i literally cried... and the saddest thing is that sooo many people feel as hopeless as this girl... here it is... if this is not motivation to witness ... you fellow christians need a slap with a big fat bible to wake you up...

Dear god, hope you get the letter and...
I pray you can make it better down here
I don't mean a big reduction in the price of beer
But all the people that you made in your image
See them starving in the street
'Cause they don't get enough to eat from god
I can't believe in you

Dear god, sorry to disturb you but...
I feel that I should be heard loud and clear
We all need a big reduction in amount of tears
And all the people that you made in your image
See them fighting in the street
'Cause they can't make opinions meet about god
I can't believe in you

Did you make disease and the diamond blue?
Did you make mankind after we made you?
And the devil too!

Dear god don't know if you noticed but...
Your name is on a lot of quotes in this book
And us crazy humans wrote it, you should take a look
And all the people that you made in your image
still believing that junk is true
Well I know it ain't, and so do you
Dear god
I can't believe in
I don't believe

I won't believe in heaven or hell
No saints, no sinners, no devil as well
No pearly gates, no thorny crown
You're always letting us humans down
The wars you bring, the babes you drown
Those lost at sea and never found
And it's the same the whole world 'round
The hurt I see helps to compound
That father, son and holy ghost
Is just somebody's unholy hoax
And if you're up there you'll perceive
That my heart's here upon my sleeve
If there's one thing I don't believe in

It's you
Dear god

Normal work week, unceasing bagel bunches, cream cheesing like a mother, early mornings out... early nights in... monotonous...blah... party...blah...work...blah...blah...blah...BANG!... God decides to wake us up again... i already knew this year would be a lot different... my mind has been put on pause yet my life has broken the button... evil little life... Everyone.. pray... things like this encourage... bless... (little things that normally you would never be able to capture in a sane mind) but at the same time i just want to curl up in a ball...pray...jesus will prevail...

I was hanging out at someones house the other day.  It was a pretty random group of people too.  To me, they are all cool people... but on the "social todem pole" some were higher than others.  Personally... i think of myself not so high up there... i think this is why i noticed so much.  As my eye wondered... i noticed the "not as cool kids" kind of clan up.  They talked amongst themselves... in quiet conversations... still enjoying themselves... just not as vocally.  I think to myself... "this is why they only have their small intimate group of friends, it is because they stick to the people they know and trust and dont TRY to make friends with the other people... i bet anyone would love spending time with these people... i think they are just intimidated and shy away, thinking they are not "cool" enough"...

but then i thought a little more about the sittuation.... the supposedly "cooler" people do the same thing though... they stay in their comfort zones... and even though they might be a little friendlier with poeple in general... they are comfortable and dont want to venture outside of their box... everyone goes back to their "fallback" friends... they dont try... ive grown a lot this summer... im not so shy around people and i can tell a definite difference in the way i act around people now than how i did before... and it truely makes me rejoice... i came out of that shindig dissapointed in people.... no one really tried... im going to try though... this year will be different... promise... i hope i can hold whoever is listening to this as well... we need to put down our sheild and let our light shine to everyone.. not just our friends... because there are a lot more people we willbe able to call that if we try....

Nine hour and 45 min shift at Panda Bread today(as my uncle calls it :) ) I literally thought i was going to pass out almost the entire time.  I have recently gotten no sleep and have been an early riser for the 5am shift everyday this week.  Tonight.  I tell myselft... do nothing.  Eat.  Drink.  Be Merry (alone with my books). 

A THOUGHT...

remember pogs? minimatchbox cars? Furbies? Digi Pets? Fun Dip? Walking Tacos? Push pops? Going to the store and directly heading to the toy section? TGIF on ABC watching boymeetsworld and Sabrina? i want to be a kid again.... frizzle snappers... im going to take a loooong hot shower and sleep... oh ya... anyone who wants to leave phil a bunch of comments he is gone on vacation until next sat....:)... loads of love!

aud

I definitely think that i am way toooo anxious to grow up.  New opportunities as well as ideas for the future enter my  mind and i wish i could step into a time machine and "zoom zoom" into the future.  Today i finally realized I am a senior in highschool.  <<scary thought>> I was forced to write out my schedual for work for when school starts as well as (pout...rolling of eyes... not looking forward to ruffing it) senior advance.  Also i recieved two calls.  The first was for my senior pictures which will be in two weeks at new Buffalo which i am stoked.  Plus i got to go on a shopping spree two days ago with my mummy for new clothes(it felt like christmas!!) The second phone call was from My SCHOOL, FLORIDA SOUTHERN!!!  It was my counselor and she was telling me all the details about early admissions etc etc.  I will be filling out my applications this week and sending them in directly after.  You know i really think this is a little excessive.  I can think of two of my friends who sent in their applications After gratuation from highschool.  Course, i will be going to a private university a million miles away (tear) but still... So ya, im excited... but... i just want it to be here already.  

off topic note.  Exciting news!  later on in the fall Oprah will be putting her most famous episodes on dvd.  I am totaly buying it!

Quote of the day: (not that i ever have quotes, but today there is a quote of the day :) )

"The credit belongs to the man (or woman) who is actually in the arena, who strives valiantly:... who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions,... and spends himself (or herself) in a worthy cause, who at the best, knows the triumph of high achievement; and who, at the worst, if he (or she) fails,... at least fails while daring greatly, so that his (or her) place shall never be with those cold and timid souls... who know neither victory nor defeat."   ~Theodore Roosevelt